This morning, while en route to Thomas, WV, I rode by my tribe's land. It was weird. I started feeling sick. I was flooded with emotions. It was the first time I had been by the area since 2004. I didn't stop because I was in somebody else's car. It was a bit overwhelming, the whole experience.
The best comparison I can think of is driving by an ex-romantic interest's house. It's like going by a place where there are so many memories, and as you go by, you are gripped with the emotions of all of the memories, good and bad. Then you are also gripped with the reality that you can't ever go back. That is a painful reality to deal with.
I'm still reeling from the experience. I would appreciate prayers for the Shawnee people. My heart breaks over the reality of what is, when I think about what could be, and what once was.
What's really sweet is that the whole rest of the day was awesome. It was just a lot of fun to be on the road with cool people, and they were willing to listen to me walk through my gut-trauma during the day.
It just hit me as I was writing--God went there before me. And He has been there with me all along.
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