Remembering Mom And Celebrating A Legacy

It's been exactly ten years since family and friends were called to say our final goodbyes to my mom as she fought tenaciously for ten months in a battle she finally lost to stage four breast cancer. As I think back to those last few days with her on this earth, there was so much of who she was becoming being manifest to each of us. She was looking forward into eternity and encouraging us with every step as her time in this world was drawing short. A few days after the announcement had come that she had a maximum of six months without treatment and a maximum of 18 months with treatment, she shared with one of her fellow church members during a time of church-wide prayer for their healing, "No matter what happens, we win!" Her attitude was infectiously positive even in the middle of trying circumstances. She always set her sights on what was possible and encouraged others to do the same in every aspect of life. She was the kind of person that people write songs about, and in fact, my best friend in the whole world, Willie, did just that.



My mom left this world at age 61 after 43 years of marriage, but I can't really bring myself to say that she died. As the philosopher Dallas Willard has said, "We are each unceasing spiritual beings with an eternal destiny in God's great universe." And as another philosopher and writer C.S. Lewis has said, "You have never met a mere mortal." When my mom left this world to be with Jesus, we mourned her departure, and celebrated the small part of her life we witnessed. And in those few years from then until now, I believe that each of us who knew her has tried to imitate her faith. You see, we can't live our lives in exactly the same way, but we can be imitators of the faith that we witness in those around us and those who have come before us. In some ways, that is one of the most beautiful gifts we can carry, and we can pass on to others who will walk this world long after we have breathed our last.

So much has happened in these last ten years. Her oldest grandchild graduated from a prestigious institution of higher learning, and her youngest grandchild only recently was born. My dad, my sister, my brother, and myself have each sought to deepen and enrich our own walks of faith, and live as a sign, a foretaste, and an instrument of God's Kingdom come, and His will being done on earth as it is in heaven--to the best of our ability.

There have been so many incredible experiences I've had over these last ten years that I wish I could share with my mom. I wish she would have been able to spend more time with Jamie, and celebrate with us on our wedding day. I wish she could have been able to meet Sylvia, and hold her and be one more experienced voice encouraging my wife as she entered into the joys and anxieties that are unique to motherhood. I wish I could have shared just a few of the photos, stories, and adventures I've been privileged to enjoy over these last ten years.

But its not just the stories from my life that I'd love to share. I wish she could see what a disciplined athlete my sister has become, and how her life has flourished over these last few years as she started running and winning trophies for her exploits on roads and trails. I wish she could have seen Dad heroically come back from a heart attack that would have killed most people. She would have loved to have seen the way he fought back and strengthened his heart, and how he gives so generously of himself to care for each of us kids and for so many others. And I wish she could see what a servant leader my brother has continued to be as well. She would have been so impressed with his recent 90 mile bike ride and the way he has led the carpool van for his work by waking up a little after 4AM every weekday for nearly 20 years to drive 8-10 coworkers over an hour to work.

Not that she wasn't proud of us before these last ten years, because she definitely was. She was a huge source of encouragement and inspiration for just about every person with whom she crossed paths. Moments of loss, as painful as they are, remind us to walk gently on this earth, and to love others deeply while we can. Seeing my mom in those last hours, unrelenting in her care for each of us as friends and family gathered in prayer, mourning and strange as it may seem, laugher, those images have become seared in my memory and in my own internal compass as I continue to seek to imitate her persevering and unshakeable tenacity and faith. Even until her last breath, she loved deeply, she ran her race strong, and she never wavered in her care for the rest of us.

If you knew my mom, you know what a special lady she was. And if you didn't, I hope you get the privilege of meeting her one day. Mom's have a special relationship with their children, and while each of us continues to live out our life with zeal and determination, I think each one of us kids (and Dad too), has those moments to this day, when all is quiet, and we have at the same time a deep sense of loss, and a deeper sense of appreciation for each moment we have.

May each of us walk gently on this earth, filled with compassion for others, and with a deep sense of awe for this beautiful place and the wonderful relationships with which the Creator of the universe has blessed each of us. And, may He give each of us space, as we need it, to grieve fully and fearlessly for those, like my mom, who have gone on to be with Jesus before us.

Review: Don’t Give Up, Don’t Give In by Louis Zamperini and David Rensin

Two years ago, Jamie and I went to see the movie Unbroken that told the story of WWII veteran Louis Zamperini and his amazing story of resilience in the face of terrible hardship. He spent more than a month floating and staying alive on a flotation raft when his plane went down and then spent over two years in POW camps in Japan. 

I recently acquired a copy of a book he wrote filled with life lessons from this former Olympic distance runner and hero. Zamperini died in 2014, but I believe Don’t Give Up, Don’t Give In: Lessons From An Extraordinary Life will be a strong part of carrying his legacy forward and providing us with an opportunity to learn from his incredible experiences.

What I loved most about the book was its readability. Zamperini was a war hero, an Olympian, and a child of an immigrant family. With 97 years under his belt at the time the book was published, he could have filled libraries with his accrued life wisdom. Instead, he kept it short and simple.

While the book covers the entirety of his life there were a few statements he made amid stories that really stuck with me.

In the opening of the book there’s a quote from Louis, ‘People tell me, “You’re such an optimist.” Am I an optimist? An optimist says the glass is half full. A pessimist says the glass is half empty. A survivalist is practical. He says, “Call it what you want, but just fill the glass.” I believe in filling the glass.’ I have to agree. Let’s keep our focus on filling the glass—and that will keep our attitude in line.

He also states, “You don’t have to go it alone.” Too often, we think that we are supposed to be figuring out this whole world all by ourselves, and rising above challenges with only our own mettle. I personally believe that we are given community so we can do amazing things together. When you are feeling alone, remember that there’s always someone out there who cares. No matter what. “Hope provides the power of the soul to endure.”

You have to learn to adapt. You can’t give up…You have to use unrelenting determination and exercise a positive attitude…We can’t all be champions, but we can give whatever is in us to give. What a reminder—give whatever is in you to give. When we hold back what is in us, we miss out on what could be our unique contribution to create a better world.

“No matter how old you are, don’t stop challenging yourself with new experiences.”

Zamperini teaches each of us that persistence, perseverance, and an unwillingness to accept defeat when things look all but hopeless, will carry us through incredibly difficult situations—for him, they carried him through surviving on a raft for 47 days among other exploits.

The last line of the book says, “I’m a thankful citizen of America who just wants to be remembered for his charitable heart.” This is his statement after enduring two years in a POW camp, after surviving 47 days on a raft after a plane crash, and after missing the Olympics to serve; he responds with gratitude for America, and a desire to be remembered for being charitable. How wonderful would our country and our world be if more of us had this kind of attitude and resolve! May we each endeavor toward this kind of response when adversity hits.

Reflection: Gazing At Gravestones And Living On Purpose

Over the last few weeks, I've had a number of occasions that have led me to take stock of my life, my legacy, and to consider my purpose during my limited time on earth. In the last week alone, have watched from afar as a close friend said goodbye to her mother, read as people were murdered by car bombs, stood-by shocked as floods overtook the homes of individuals in the southern part of my home state of West Virginia. And this past Sunday, I attended Horizons Church in Salem, WV with my wife and her parents.

Each time I visit that church, I try to take a moment and gaze up the hill behind the church and look at the tombstones representing generations past. Actually, every time I pass by a cemetery when I am on foot, I find myself doing this same exercise. I take in the whole of the cemetery, or I focus in on a few of the tombstones. I try to go back in my mind to consider the lives of those represented. Did they have family and friends gather about their grave after they had breathed their last? Do people still visit their final resting places today in remembrance of their life. What were they living for? What principles did they carry forth in their lives? What were their great triumphs and tragedies?What were their dreams?

And then after considering those lives, I strive to take a few moments to think about my own life, and purpose. It's a bit of a gut-check for me to think about my own mortality, and what I want to be true of my life when I breathe my last and see my Creator face-to-face. I know it can sound a bit morbid or gruesome, but there's something sobering and rejuvenating in this process for me. As King David wrote in the Psalms, "Behold, you have made my days a few handbreadths, and my lifetime as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath!" Our lives are temporal. Even Reebok, in this recent commercial encourages us to "Honor the body we have been given" as we consider the brevity of days we have on this earth



This time as I looked at the cemetery and took a quick photo, I found myself considering the ways we can both individually and collectively slip into a life of self-indulgent comfort and ease. As Theodore Roosevelt once said, A mere life of ease is not in the end a very satisfactory life, and, above all, it is a life which ultimately unfits those who follow it for serious work in the world."

I believe each one of us were made for a unique God-honoring purpose, and there is something deeply fulfilling as we discover that purpose, and live passionately out of that purpose. Each of us has a one-of-a-kind contribution to make to the world, and I believe part of the path toward our contribution demands a surrender of comfort and ease for the sake of service to others. Our purpose tends to call to us sometimes softly and other times loudly to step out of our lethargy and "do the work" of becoming the best version of ourselves for the glory of God and the betterment of humanity.

For me, that purpose inspires me to rise daily and to put forth effort to be physically and mentally strong so I can have something to offer to others from my body. It inspires me to pour time into the betterment of and care for others by helping others to be able to make meaningful choices for their future. And even as I write and consider that grand purpose, there's also the hard truth staring me in the face. Sometimes I like to sleep in. Sometimes I find myself wanting to pursue a life of ease. And that's why I'm grateful for the gut-check provided by gazing at a graveyard. One day, I will cease to live this life. I find it helpful in light of this to ask questions of myself like, "What kind of person am I becoming? What kind of person do I want to become?"

What about you? How do you stay mindful of your purpose, and how do you keep fanning the flame to keep moving forward? Whatever it is, my hope is that you and I are able to continue to develop routines in our lives that will help us bring our very best selves to this beautiful majestic world in a way that embodies honor, service, fierce courage, commitment, and tenacious faith. To do anything else is to shrink away from a strong call of duty and a wonderful legacy.

Walking Along The Thames and Catching A Glimpse Of Shakespeare's Globe Theatre

I've been meaning to post some photos and share some stories from my recent trips to visit Nuru's work in Kenya and Ethiopia as well as from the long layovers I had in London but time waits for no one. So as I'm getting adjusted back to life in Morgantown, I thought I could start taking some time to reflect before the memories fade. There was a lot of travel back in August, and a lot more stories to share, but for a starter I thought I'd share this photo of Shakespeare's Globe Theatre in London.

During my layover on my return trip back to the US, I had enough time to leave the airport, take The Tube and walk along The Thames. I walked by a number of landmarks including the rebuilt London Bridge.

So as I walked along the Thames it was simply amazing to look around and see so many historic landmarks, and to just think about the history of this city. As some already know, among other degrees I received a BA and MA in English from WVU. My focus for my Master's was largely the literature of early America, but during undergrad I took a variety of survey courses--including a course that was entirely Shakespeare. In high school, I used to love it when we would go through sections of Shakespeare in English class as well.

The reason why I loved these classes and times was because we would always dig into the drama. Even in college, we would take time each week for people to read dramatically or act out parts from different plays. We would watch scenes from movies like Hamlet (with Mel Gibson) or Kenneth Branagh Shakespearean plays, or at WVU, we were encouraged to visit the Lansburgh Shakespeare Theatre--which was amazing. Plays always seemed to have a lesson at work, and they always seemed to lend themselves well to re-reading and experimenting with different ways of presenting the words--they were always fun. They were especially fun when people would read in-character.

A flood of memories from English classes and movies came to my mind as I saw this building--The Globe--a rebuilt replica of the place where Shakespeare's plays were performed (the original site was a few hundred feet from this site). In my mind I tried to picture what that world was like. The Theatre was built right around the time of multiple explorations to the New World, and it was estimated to have a capacity of 3,000 audience members.

Even though the building I saw was a re-creation of the original, it stood as a reminder of a different time in England's history, world history, and as a testimony to the power of a good story. Shakespeare's plays are still being read and performed--they have stood a four hundred year test of time--there are not many stories that have echoed down through the centuries like this--it seems like Shakespeare understood the intricacies of human experience--both the good and the bad of human nature and could help people see their own selves (or people they knew) in the lives of the characters of the play. Maybe that's why his plays have stood the test of time, and why people have chosen to resurrect a replica of what the original Shakespearean experience might have been like.

Everyone loves a good story, and as much as it's great to hear a good story or watch a good story on the big screen or in the media, I think the world would be the better if we chose to live a good story as well. So as each of us goes about our day, may we take time to reflect not only on the good stories we have heard or seen, but may we take time to create and live a good story through the events of our daily lives. We've each been given a story to live, and we have an opportunity to live it out in an incredible way that shapes not only ourselves, but also shapes this world to be a better place.

Training For A Marathon: Training For A Life

Running a long distance race has been something I've often thought about doing, but I always thought my first race longer than a 10K would have been the Parkersburg Half-Marathon. I guess I've never really been one to do something half way. ;)

Last October, Jamie and I joined 20 other runners from around the country to run the 38th Annual Marine Corps Marathon in an effort to raise funds and awareness for Nuru. And we are doing it again this year. It was a pretty incredible experience running through our nation's capital with over 30,000 runners from around the world. And it was an added bonus to have the support of the men and women of the United States Marine Corps as we journeyed along the 26.2 mile course.

This year, as we start training, we look forward to being joined in DC for the race by my best friend in the whole world, Willie, and possibly my sister, Becky. Willie has never run a marathon, but my sister has (and she flew!). A year ago I had never run a marathon, and neither had Jamie. I highly recommend giving it a try for anyone who has ever thought about it. In fact, it would be great to have you join us in running for Nuru in the future.

We found a training plan from a runner named Jeff Galloway. His plan boasted that it had helped thousands of runners train without injury. And the plan was available for free online! Back in the year 2000, I had started getting semi-serious about running, and I picked up a copy of a book by Jeff Galloway called Galloway's Book On Running. It's a great one if you are looking for a book to guide you in getting started running. Back in 2000, it was one of about five total books I could find on the subject at the bookstore. Now there are tons.

What I love about training for a marathon, is that it equips you not only with the discipline you need for running a long-distance endurance race, but also for the discipline you need to accomplish any major goal. You see, most people can't just go out their door and run a marathon tomorrow. They've gotta train for it; they must plan for it. When I started training, I had not run with any regularity in years, and the last time I had run, it was for about 2-3 miles and it was probably 6 months prior to signing up for the race.

Training last year started toward the end of March, and culminated at the end of October. Slowly and steadily Jamie and I added miles. We had to plan for even the 30-45 minute runs we did twice weekly. But the long runs required much more planning. I knew that if I wanted to have any chance at finishing a marathon, I had to be disciplined about getting out to run the longer runs. I had to block out hours of time for the longer runs. And I knew after those runs I would be really tired. So six months, three times each week, I needed to block out time to get ready, run, and rest. I needed to buy something to keep my energy levels up as I ran, so I bought Clif Shot Bloks.  It took planning, it took preparation, and it took discipline. And we all need that if we want to accomplish any larger goals in this life. Most people don't just sit down and read the Bible, they read a little bit at a time and get to their goal. Most people don't wake up and start playing the guitar. They practice, and little by little they build the skills to be able to play a song or two. It takes time. It takes discipline. It takes desire.

And that's why most people don't run marathons. Most people don't play an instrument. Most folks have never read the Bible. Most folks in the states have never planted a garden (not true for our global neighbors though).

So this year we planning to run another marathon. And that's another thing. Just because you have done it once, doesn't mean it is automatic. But, going through the process this time, we know we can do it--because we have done it. It isn't as daunting, but it takes just as much effort.

What is your big goal? It may not be to run a marathon, but whatever it is, you are going to need to map out a plan for it. Get to it. You are burning daylight. Every day you wait is that much longer before you complete your goal. You will be glad you started, and likely the world will be better because you took the time and applied the discipline to see yourself to the finish line. And, after you finish, the next goal will still take hard work, but it will be a little bit easier because you know what it takes to finish!

River People and Hill People: Ohio River Reflections

Many years ago I had a an Indian friend tell me that there are really two types of people--river people and hill people. As much as I love the mountains, and as inspiring as it is to climb a summit, I'd have to say I'm a river person. I grew up on the Ohio River, or Pelewathiipi as my ancestors called it.

I've swum in this stream and pulled a wide variety of fish from its waters. I've boated to its islands, and I've hiked, biked, and driven along its shores. And I'm not the first in my family to have this intimate connection to what the French called La Belle Rivière. I've often watched the sun set along the rippling waters of the Ohio and found myself reflecting on the past or dreaming about the future.

You see, the rivers and the mountains, they both carry an array of stories of their inhabitants. Sometimes you can hear echoes in the ripples or in the wind. Last week, my dad, Jamie, and I stood atop a hill looking down on the river and into the Ohio country near Parkersburg. As I we watched the sun sneak behind some low floating clouds and disappear from our view, I found myself thinking about all of those who have come before to this place, and my own history with this river.

There are some places that we make a habit and a lifestyle of visiting. For me, the Ohio River is probably the most longstanding sacred space in my family. At times I feel as though something is missing or my visit is incomplete if I don't make it to at least gaze upon this river for a few fleeting moments before journeying onward. It's as though the river is one of my longest standing friends, and she always seems to have time to catch up, and after leaving, I always feel refreshed, renewed, and as though I've connected with something not quite supernatural, but still larger than myself. Maybe that's the way it is with all of the creation. I find, quite similar to Jonathan Edwards, that there is an image or shadow of the divine in the whole of creation. When I see the rolling mysterious waters of the Ohio, I'm reminded that there is Someone who is larger and more powerful than any river, and yet I can't even get my mind around the power and majesty of the river.

Are you a river person or a hill person? Where are the places you find yourself journeying towards as though catching up with an old friend or relative? If you don't have a place, I hope you can find a little sanctuary in your neighborhood whether it be a hill, a river, or some other parcel of the created world.

Review: Teaching A Stone To Talk by Annie Dillard

I first discovered Annie Dillard while taking a graduate seminar on Ecocriticism at West Virginia University. Dillard was not part of the assigned reading, but rather an author who my professor and multiple classmates thought I would enjoy as I contemplated writings that considered both the Christian faith tradition and how various American writers of faith had observed nature as a teacher with regard to spiritual truths during this country’s short history.  For the class, I had read her Pulitzer Prize winning book PilgrimAt Tinker Creek, and that book gave me a desire to read more of her works. To be clear, I don't believe that Dillard would call herself a "Christian author" in the sense of one who writes specifically for faith audiences, but I found myself deeply appreciative of her authenticity in writing about her faith and life.

It has been some time since I first read the book, but I remember with some degree of clarity sitting in a Chipotle in or near Worthington, OH as I made my way through some portion of the book while drinking some kind of bottled juice and enjoying a large burrito filled with rice, beans, chicken and lots of flavor.

Teaching A Stone To Talk, originally written in 1982, is a wonderful series of essays about faith, life, and a variety of observations about both that are rooted and grounded in the reality of the author’s experiences of living a life of faith in 20^th century America. To be clear, it isn’t so much a book about faith or about daily life as it is a book about obserations taken in during the rhythms of weeks, months, and years. The essays are grounded and rooted in place and in what feels like actual experiences.

As I read her essays, there were times that I laughed, sympathized, and wept as I considered some of the experiences very akin to some I had also been through. The world needs writers like Dillard that encourage us to think deeply about the every day in light of eternity, and to not take ourselves too seriously. Looking for a good book of essays that has stood the test of time? Grab this book and giving at read, and looking through Dillard’s lens of daily life’s expeditions and encounters.

My 2013 Goals

Over the last few years, I’ve tried to carve out a little time in December/January to reflect on the past year, and to set goals for the year ahead. Some are justifiably cynical when it comes to things like New Year’s Resolutions, but personally, I believe that the beginning of a new year offers a perfect occasion for reflection and for goal setting.  When I think about my own goals, it is my hope that the end of each year I will have become a better version of myself than I was at the beginning. That means engaging in activities that will help me improve myself with regard to my mind, my body, my heart, and my spirit.

So here are my top ten goals for 2013.

Carve Out Time For Reflection—Whether it is for engaging in spiritual disciplines like Sabbath, Solitude, Silence, and Fasting, or it is merely taking time to breathe deeply and reflect on the day’s accomplishments, I want to take more time for reflection in 2013. Specifically I’d like to carve out five minutes of my day as a minimum to reflect.

Blog More Consistently—For the last two years I have set blogging goals and failed at them each year. Last year I had the meager goal of 105 posts, and barely got past 75 posts. This year, I want to strive toward 105 posts again. I feel like this is a realistic goal, but it will require a degree of discipline.

Exercise—Why not? Over the last two years I’ve been able to cultivate a consistent habit of fitness. In 2013, I hope to continue the trend.

Lose weight—As I start 2013, I have weighed in at 190 lbs. During 2013 I’d like to lose at least 10 additional pounds, and maintain the weight over the course of the year.

Parkersburg Half-Marathon—This goal has eluded me for my entire life, but I hope that 2013 will have a different outcome. I also hope to run the Marine Corps Marathon for Nuru International this fall!

Steward Our Resources More Wisely—In 2012, Jamie and I continued our trend toward lowering our footprint, shrinking our spending, and being more earth friendly. We hope to continue the trend in 2013. 

Get Outdoors—In 2012, I was able to spend at least 30 minutes outside almost every day of the year. I really believe that getting outside does wonders for the constitution, and I hope to continue this trend in 2013.

Connect—Jamie and I have been blessed with an amazing group of friends, and we hope to continue to stay connected with our friends both near and far as we venture out in 2013.

Plant A Garden—Every year we set this as a goal, and it is our hope to grow even more of our own food in 2013.

Leave Margins—I’m terrible about leaving space in my schedule. In 2013, I hope that I can leave more time for unplanned spontaneity and epic adventures.

What are your 2013 goals? Are you hitting them so far?

Thinking Back To September 11 2001

The day started like any other day for me at Mylan Pharmaceuticals. I was an analytical chemist working in quality control. I had walked from my apartment which was just about a mile from Mylan, and arrived slightly before 7AM the way I had walked many times before that day. I had written up some work from the previous day's testing, and was beginning sample preparation for some more tests. We used to listen to the radio in the lab back then, and we were stunned in our workday when we heard the first news broadcast at slightly before 9AM. I don't think any of us knew how to respond to it. How could anyone? What we were listening to was so foreign to our ears. How could any of this have happened? And then, as the day went on, we continued to do our work as we listened attentively to update after update, each one stirring us freshly. What was happening to our world?

I remember in the early afternoon that I made the decision to post a note on our break room door for a time of prayer for anyone who was interested. It seemed like the one thing that was within our power was to call upon the Creator of the universe to share our fears, our concerns, and our deep sadness over what we had heard over the radio over the course of the day. As I walked home at the end of the work day, I wondered about all of the people who had been in those towers. I grew sad as I thought of families and friends who would never be reunited in this world. I grew angry at evil and injustice.

When I arrived at the apartment, I found my roommate sitting in the living room, his eyes glued to the unbelievable images on the television. Was this really happening? I remember phone calls going out, to say that our church, like many communities of faith,  was having a special time of prayer for our nation and for our world that evening.  We were all stirred to our core as we tried to comprehend what we had witnessed on television and over the radio waves that day.

I remember seeing images in the days after the event of missing person postings as people wondered if their loved ones had been among the survivors or not. I even remember seeing, for a moment, what I thought was a photo of one of my high school classmates, Mary Lou Hague. Unfortunately, Mary Lou was among those whose lives were lost on that day. I mourn the loss of a friend, but I can't begin to imagine what her family and the families and friends of so many others continue to feel every year as this day approaches.

So much has happened in all of our lives since that day. I have watched a number of friends graduate from college, start new careers, move to new locations, and even get married (and I've actually done those myself). We have buried loved ones, and watched new technologies develop at a remarkable pace. We have witnessed changes in our lives and in our culture that at one time we could not even imagine.

When flying before the events of September 11, I remember sitting with friends and loved ones as I waited for my plane to arrive at my gate in the airport. Since that time, I have learned to say my goodbyes enroute to the airport. I have many fond memories of saying goodbye or hello to family and friends at airport gates, but since September 11, no new memories like that are possible.  And as I walk into a variety of hotels and other buildings, I am reminded, as I empty my pockets to walk through metal detectors, that today's world is very different. Today, various agencies work tirelessly to insure that our lives are safer, and that an event like what happened 11 years ago does not happen again.

In the eleven year wake of September 11, 2001, one thing hasn't changed. I believe that people have not lost hope. We have not lost the opportunity to do good in our world. Every day, we have opportunities to love our neighbors, to practice kindness, and to strive to be a help to others. As you read these words, I ask you to consider how you might help make the world a better place. We live in a world that is still hurting, but we have not lost hope. This hurting world needs people like you and me to actively pursue ways in which we can work toward a better tomorrow. May we all consider our how we can contribute to a brighter future, and may we never grow weary in doing good.